Support for cannabis legalization is spreading like a green mossy wave. Unfortunately, the working world has not kept pace with this recent push to make things more green. In most work environments, cannabis use constitutes a policy violation that may lead to disciplinary action leading up to  termination. Far worse,  there still exists the negative social stigma of being a drug user. Many people in the corporate world hold the view that cannabis is a dirty drug done by social deviants. So, if you do happen to lose your position because of your cannabis use you may lose some, if not all, of your career advocates— potentially impeding your future employment opportunities.
Obviously, there are safety sensitive positions that should be drug tested and use shouldn’t be tolerated. No one wants their airline pilot or child’s school bus driver coming on shift stoned off their asses. It’s also best if glazed-over production workers do not inadvertently stick their hands into moving pieces of machinery. But, what about for the rest of us — the boring job holders, the administrators of stuff, the leaders of people,  the managers of processes, the writers of code? Why should our employers worry about our off-work cannabis consumption? Especially if it makes us more engaged happier employees.
The working world will eventually catch-up to this whole cannabis thing. Policies will be developed for certain positions. Companies will no longer persecute employees with broadly applied draconian drug testing rules. Compound tolerance levels will be established and better methods to accurately test on-site impairment will be developed. This will allow the casual user the birth right of anonymous off duty cannabis consumption, for whatever reason. Until then, if you need to pay bills, its important to stay employed. Keeping your job means being discreet with your cannabis use.
Below are 4 simple rules that can be followed to help insure your cannabis consumption goes undetected at work:
- Ditch the flame — Use methods of consuming other than smoking: Combustion of cannabis has ancillary effects aside from the awesome heavy high. Obviously there is that easily recognizable dank skunky smell, but smoke also impacts your eyes and mouth — picture any poster child high-school stoner; red eyes, cotton mouth, and dragon breath. These are sure markers for cannabis use. Fortunately, consumption has evolved far beyond fire. Edibles and extracts are easily obtained and companies are competing hand over fist to provide a better refined and more powerful product. And not only does the powerful high last longer, the smell is ambiguous and does not linger like smoke. Re-medicating between meetings and during lunch is virtually undetectable if proper precautions are followed. For those with limited access to extracts or edibles flower vaporizers and basic hygiene practices (eye drops, mouthwash, etc.) can help protect your secret cannabis identity. The classic desktop Volcano vaporizers are awesome. They provide gigantic hits, the vapor bag allows you to walk around your house and  they heat up quickly, but they can cost up to 600 bucks fully loaded. Da Vinci and The Kind Pen are great portable vaporizer options. They are fairly inexpensive, can be ordered online, and available for delivery regardless of what state you live in . Plus, they fit in your pocket.
- Don’t show your tells — Recognize your unconscious quirks while your high: In college I had a friend, who whenever was high, would continually shift his weight back and forth from left foot to right. it reminded me of a bad impression of an awkward seventh grade dance participant —Left right, left right, left right.  Watching him order at Baskin Robbins, was funny as fuck —not so much the dance that he would do, but more the reaction to him by the employee. It was somewhere between bewilderedment and pitty.  This behavior was hilarious to me, but to him, totally unconscious. And, when high, it was greatly exaggerated both in amplitude and frequency. Everyone could clearly see my buddy was high by witnessing his little dance. Most of us have similar small tells. It may be an audible tick (umm, err, uhhh) or a physical manifestation like my friends two step jig. These unconscious behaviors can put a spotlight on you, the real you, your stoned self. Be aware of what your two step jig is and take steps to counter it or distract from it.
- Establish a clean platform — Create the persona of a healthy individual who is tied to their work and does not desire to consume drugs. Regardless of the industry or department you work in, Inevitably the topic of drugs and cannabis use will arise.  Agreeing with a pro cannabis position can potentially expose your own drug use. Agreeing with an anti cannabis stance seals your fate as the intolerant uneducated dick of the office. The best practice is to ignore the conversation  and not comment at all.  If it can be done in an inconspicuous way,  leave the room. If you are pressed for a comment having a canned response prepared such as, “I tried cannabis a couple times in college, but couldn’t imagine smoking it now, I wouldn’t get anything done. But to each his own.”  Leave the stoner nomenclature at home. Be wary of the dudes,  bros, and mans, you include in your  verbal lineup.  Looking the part is always important. it goes without saying that you shouldn’t be wearing dank weed smelling clothing or  that is not suitable for your position or industry.  The goal is to look benign and blend in as much as possible.Â
- Dose according to task– Consume the right strain of cannabis at the right time for the right task: Not all cannabis strains are created equally. Aside from the simple classification of sativa and indica there exists a multitude of complex cannibinoid combinations that make up thousands of cannabis strains. THC is but one of the many compounds of the cannabis flower that has therapeutic or psychoactive effects. It is important to understand the individual effects of the strain(s). Smoking a strong couch smashing indica might not be the best idea if your next task is presenting in front of a group of people. You may come off as a sluggish dope. Likewise, a super heady sativa doesn’t support sitting quietly in a board room reviewing year to date financials. Controlling your fidgets, trying to sit still, while worked up on some powerful Sour Diesel is close to torture. Being knowledgeable about the individual chemical profiles of these thousands of cannabis strains doesn’t require a PhD in chemistry. Several resources exist to help identify the chemical makeup, intended effects, and retail outlet to purchase specific cannabis strains. Leafly is a great fluid repository’s of cannabis data, industry knowledge and locations to purchase both the medical and recreational cannabis you are looking for.
Someday we will all live in a world where one can choose to medicate without worrying about losing their employment. A world where cannabis is openly discussed in the workplace and how it can benefit employees and the company rather than being viewed as detrimental. Â A world where cannabis is openly discussed in the workplace and how it can benefit employees and the company rather than being viewed as detrimental. However, until then, staying employed and medicated on cannabis requires a little more effort.Â